Dangerous Dan's Diner
714 Queen St. E.
Toronto, ON M4M 1H2
Canada
If you know me, you know I'm all about chase. But when it comes to beef, more specifically - burgers, it's all about the catch. I've been on the hunt for the cities best burgers for a while now. If only I had kept track of where I'd been and which burgers I've tried - prior to a couple weeks ago that would make a lot more sense.. doh!
I first read about Dangerous Dan's Diner a couple years ago on an online article about unhealthy food. It's located in an area of the city known as 'Leslieville'. Dangerous Dan's Diner is nestled between a strip club (Jilly's) and small, local area specialty shops. Their claim to burger fame is their outrageously big and greasy burgers. I headed inside along with 3 friends who were up for some burger madness.
The Review:
Inside, it lived up to reputation of being a 'dive'. At first glance, it looked like something out of the movie 'The Hills Have Eyes'. The chairs and booths were old seats out of Dodge Caravans that seemed to be stained with what smelled like shit and spoiled food. There was a large picture on the wall of Dangerous Dan himself with his cat. I wouldn't be surprised if he f*cked that cat, killed it, and used the cat meat to make a mystery burger which was the inspiration for his now famous burgers. Far fetched, but possible. We sat down, and were quickly told that nobody serves us and we need to go the front to order. My 3 friends all ordered single 8 ounce (1/2 lb.) burgers with cheese - $5.39. I opted for the 16 ounce (1 lb.) double with cheese - $8.65. Somebody ordered onion rings - $3.35, and a side order of fries - $3.09.
Since the patties are pretty thick, it took about 10 minutes before the burgers were ready. Ready, set, eat! My 16 ounce double burger with cheese was huge. Taking a massive bite, the burger pattie started to fall apart immediately. Pieces of the pattie were falling onto the plate at a fast pace. It was soft, greasy and didn't have any seasoning. It did however have a strange sort of 'gaminess' taste to it. Scary. The damn thing just kept breaking apart with every bite. By the time I was half done, it looked like I had ordered a plate of ground beef. Most of it had crumbled onto the plate and I was forced to use a fork to pick up the pieces. My co-foodie told me her burger tasted like cleaning products. I don't doubt her - there were probably traces of cleaning product in there. The onion rings and fries - stay away. From the taste of them, you can tell the oil in the fryer hadn't been changed in a long time. The fries were the standard shitbox frozen kind. The gravy was completely bland. The bun? Now the bun was pretty good. Nice and soft, so you could really compress the burger to make it manageable.
The Verdict:
Dangerous Dan's Diner - now I know why there are marijuana logo's all over the menu. The only way to enjoy the food there is if you're high. IMHO, it's a 3 out of 10. The prices were good for the size of the burgers. The bun was good. But the texture, blandness, gaminess and cleaning product taste of the actual pattie combined with the old grease tasting frozen fries and gravy with no taste make this a place I don't think I'd come back to. Not even if I was high. Even if you offered me a joint and then a free meal followed by free drinks I'd have to reluctantly say no.
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